


I Want You Here

by calrissian18



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M, Mpreg, Spoiler Warning in Notes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-31
Updated: 2013-05-31
Packaged: 2017-12-13 13:52:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/825011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calrissian18/pseuds/calrissian18
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Draco's skin is flawless and milky but he doesn't reach for it. Only disappointment will meet his fingertips; he has learned the hard way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Want You Here

"Get up."

Harry turns to bury his face in his pillow so he can better ignore the soft voice.

"You can't stay in bed forever."

Harry grudgingly raises his head to see bright grey eyes staring warmly down at him. Draco's skin is flawless and milky but he doesn't reach for it. Only disappointment will meet his fingertips; he has learned the hard way. Blond hair hangs down in front of his face and Harry can remember the feel of Draco dragging it across his lips to wake him, but those days were long gone. They never touched anymore.

"Beautiful," is all he can muster.

"Up, you."  There's a grin woven through the words.

"I downe wanna," Harry mutters into the pillow.

"I know, handsome.  But it's a new day."

_So what_ , he thinks. There's hardly any reason to mark the passing of time anymore.

With more persistence from Draco, he leaves the bed and dresses for the day. He wants to ask if his tie matches his shirt but his breath stutters in his chest as his eyes fall to the bed. Draco is stretched out with nothing but thin, leave-nothing-to-the-imagination sheets between Harry's gaze and the naked skin he knows waits beneath. Draco props himself up on his elbow and watches him dress almost bashfully.

"I should go, you know. It's not right that I'm here," he says.

Harry turns back to his closet, swallowing hard.  "I want you here."

"It's not good for you," Draco says and Harry can see him picking lint from the sheets in his periphery.  "I'm being selfish."  He snorts.  "Try to contain your gasps of surprise."

Harry smiles despite himself and only whispers lowly, "I want you here."

He goes to work where people avoid him or look at him as if he were a cancer patient. He wants to scream at them but he doesn't have the energy. His voice is already hoarse.  He stays for the whole day and he hasn't done that in ages but he can't face the empty bed at home. Draco never stays and Harry needs him by his side constantly. It's unfair to ask, but that changes nothing.

He's been invited to Ron and Hermione's and Draco's promised to go and that is the only reason Harry hasn't returned to the sanctuary of his bed.

He brings them a pie he bought five minutes before he knocked on the door.  Draco had prodded him to be a model guest and Harry had never been able to refuse those eyes.

He wants to kiss him but the door is opening and he restrains himself from attempting. His friends look upon him pityingly as well. He doesn't want those looks, those small sighs when he enters the room, the whispered words that convey nothing but heartache.

They make small talk but he's not really listening and loses the thread easily. He is staring at Draco and he thinks they know it.

"Pay attention to them, not me, buffoon."

He smiles and tries to focus on the news of the new baby, the promotion.  He's glad their lives have culminated at their most successful peak while his is nothing but misery and heart-wrenching, soul-numbing pain. He is. Really.

He doesn't want their sympathy nor does he really want their company. He doesn't think anyone deserves happiness now.

He forces a smile on his face as they explain that their daughter is starting pre-school in a week's time. He looks at Draco.  He's two months along and they know it will be their son, their beautiful son James. Draco had  _finally_ relented to the name as long as he got to pick the next one. The urge to slide a hand over Draco's stomach is overwhelming but this is their moment, not his to covet.

He realizes when he glances back to see their distressed expressions that he has been staring at Draco and nothing else for nearly five minutes.

Draco adds the pressure of his eyes. "I told you I shouldn't have come."

Harry shakes his head almost imperceptibly. Now is not the time. He convinces Ron and Hermione he's fine, though the concerned glances still flood him when they think he won't notice. The rest of the dinner passes without achievement or interest and he thanks them for a wonderful meal because Draco would be disappointed if he wasn't a model guest.

They look at him sadly.  "We've never really gotten a chance to say we're sorry," Hermione tries as he's nearly out the door.

Harry shakes off the hand Ron has felt the need to place on his shoulder, "It's fine. I'm fine." He's trying to cut off the inevitable, 'how are you holding up,' question. He silently begs them not to ask and his fists clench as he waits.

"We should have been there for you, more than we were," Hermione says, eyes bright.

Harry all but sneers. " _He_ is more than enough for me."

Ron looks like he's taken a blow and he says thickly, "You mean ' _was_ '?"

Harry's nostrils flare.  "Did I say was?" he asks mockingly.

Hermione sighs, as though in her infinite wisdom she's expected this scenario.  "He's dead, Harry."

Harry wants to strangle her. Of course he is. As if he wasn't aware? Perhaps in _their_ absence they had forgotten that it was _Harry_ who watched him cease to be, that it was _his_ hands that were stained red with blood that he could never wash away as he panickingly tried to stem the flow. They never even knew about his son, who will forever be seven months from existence.

He turns on his heel and slams the door behind him, seething.

Draco is at his side when he opens his eyes again, right where he belongs.  "They're right you know," he says quietly.  "I should go."

Harry gives a sharp shake of his head, says fiercely, "I want you here."

**Author's Note:**

> Major Character Death - as though it wasn't _obvious_.
> 
> Sorry, some of these are soooo old.


End file.
